What to Expect If You Are the Person Who Caused Harm

This process is not about shaming you. It is about accountability, honesty, and making things right.

How You Got Here

You were referred to RRDRJ because someone believes you are capable of:

Taking responsibility for what happened
Understanding the impact of your actions
Making meaningful repair instead of just being punished

This might have come through police, a school, the court, or a community referral.

Responsibility, Understanding, and Meaningful Repair

1

An Initial Conversation

You’ll meet with a trained restorative justice facilitator. This meeting is:

One-on-one
Confidential (within legal limits)
About understanding what happened and where you’re at

You’ll be asked things like:

What happened?
What were you thinking at the time?
What have you thought about since?
Who do you think has been affected?
Are you willing to take responsibility?

Important:
If you are not ready to take responsibility, the process will not move forward.

If the process continues, you’ll be prepared carefully before anything else happens.
That means:

You’ll know exactly who will be involved
You’ll know what questions will be asked
You’ll have support people identified if needed
You’ll be helped to speak honestly without becoming defensive or shutting down

Step 2: Preparation

Depending on the situation, this might include:

A restorative conference
A circle process
Written accountability (letters, reflections)
Non-contact options where appropriate

If there is a conference:

Everyone speaks one at a time
There is no yelling, blaming, or attacking
Facilitators hold the structure so things don’t spiral
The focus stays on impact, responsibility, and repair

Step 3: The Restorative Process

Together, an agreement is created that answers: “What needs to happen to repair the harm?”

Agreements might include:

Apologies (verbal or written)
Repairing or replacing damaged property
Community service
Counselling or support programs
Education or skill-building
Actions that rebuild trust

Agreements must be:

Realistic
Achievable
Meaningful to the person harmed
Something you genuinely commit to completing

Step 4: Making an Agreement

You’re not left to figure it out alone.

Someone checks in on progress
Support or mentorship may be offered
Adjustments can be made if something truly isn’t working
Completion is confirmed before the file is closed

If this was a police or court referral, completion is reported back.

Step 5: Follow-Through and Support